Gays in public

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However, Schwules* had the brilliant idea to organize a meeting between Agnès Giard, a well-known French journalist and sex researcher, and Manuela Kay, a Berlin-based lesbian activist, journalist and porn director, for a public debate focused on the feminine perspectives of promiscuity in public places. I asked him for his name and he answered with tears in his eyes: “Please, write: for Heinz and Jürgen.”

Interview has been condensed and edited.


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You’re technically allowed to flirt or meet up with strangers in public – if that’s all you’re doing. It’s not-so-subtle patriarchal politics. Take any trash (like lube packets, wipes or condom wrappers) with you. But what about countries where homosexuality is still prohibited? Due to structural racism in law enforcement, cruising can be riskier for Black and Indigenous people.

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Cruising tips

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If you’re going to cruise, here are a few tips to make things safer.

There are recorded cruising spots in cities like Toronto, London and New York dating back over a hundred years. Try taking a friend or arranging a time to check in with someone afterwards.

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Be discreet

Cruising for sex carries a risk – for some people, that makes it hot. The motivation for this exhibition goes beyond mere nostalgia.

His Schwules* exhibition, selections from which feature below, includes both photos Martin staged himself to reenact cruising scenarios and selections from his historical collection to bring visitors through the history of toilet cruising. That’s why—without ignoring the sexual dimension—I’m very proud to exhibit 150 years of history connected with public urinals here.


The reaction of women is captivating.

gays in public

He advocates for a nuanced approach, suggesting that while public sex may not be socially acceptable, the legal system should focus on harm-reduction strategies rather than punitive measures.

The ethical dimensions are equally complex. It is a world that’s always been forbidden to them, and they’re fascinated to discover it, including the chapter in the exhibition on women’s toilets.

These can all be turn-ons for some people.

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Is cruising legal?

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Cruising for sex in licensed sex venues is legal. The digital realm has shaped the norms and practices surrounding public sex, offering both opportunities and risks.

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He said that sixty years ago, he’d met a stranger there—a stranger who would become his partner, now dead.

(Full disclosure: I’m a Schwules* employee in the curation and exhibition department.) And while many modern queers would rather forget this chapter of their people’s sordid past, public restrooms are undeniably places where community and connection were kindled among us against unlikely odds. They would go there with someone they had met beforehand and knew, not with a total stranger.

The anonymity provided by the internet can also lead to a false sense of security, with individuals failing to recognize the potential risks of meeting strangers in isolated public spaces.

Despite these challenges, the digital realm continues to play a pivotal role in shaping the culture and practices surrounding gay sex in public.

Does that make “toilet sex” a story of sadness, a situation we should be happy to forget? But remember that in many cases, public hookups are against the law. Some people will have sex right there, while some may take their partner to a more discreet location. While it remains a controversial topic, the increasing visibility and advocacy within the LGBTQ+ community is fostering a more nuanced and empathetic understanding.

Here’s a few of the most common:

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Safety

Cruising spots in public can be safer than a stranger’s apartment.